This Week on Billboard: Beyoncé - Irreplaceable

This Week On Billboard is where I unabashedly critique the current no. 1 hit on Billboard.com, the major yardstick for what's "hot" in music today. In order to simplify the review for those who don't want to read the whole article, each song is given a "!" rating, in which the finest grabs five of them.

Weeks in No. 1: 10

Weeks in Chart: 16

From the B'Day LP

!!!

First of all, a song title can't pull a complete 180 like this. One would assume that a track called "Irreplaceable" would narrate stories of devotion; not here, though. Beyoncé's waving her fingers, claiming that her soon-to-be ex-man is not irreplaceable. It's confusing.

The double negative might have been the handiwork of songwriter Ne-Yo. He admittedly has an ear for addictive candied melody; however, for an artist that has "songwriter" highlighted in his resumé, his lyrics have always been sub-par and "Irreplaceable" is not an irregularity.

And it's unconvincing, especially if your affairs are as public as Beyoncé's. This bold attempt in keeping her I-don't-need-a-man independent woman reputation is a little reachy when you're well aware that she's chilling in a yacht at Monaco with H to the Izzo.

Other than that, it's not annoying. The acoustic guitar-drum machine production is bland, like a watered-down "Torn" by Natalie Imbruglia, but it's not repulsive. I was never a fan of mid-tempo Beyoncé and this didn't pursuade me to think otherwise. It's passable but it's not irreplaceable.